Facebook for Torchwood
by Ender's Fangirl
Summary: Hasn't everybody thought about doing a Facebook fic for some thing or other? COMPLETE BECAUSE I HAVE A MILLION OTHER THINGS
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Haha. Hasn't everyone thought about making a facebook fic for something? Here's mine!

Disclaimer: I am a hobo. I own nothing.

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><p><strong>Gwen Cooper friend requested Andy Davidson.<br>****Gwen Cooper's friend request was accepted.**

**Gwen Cooper friend requested Rhys Williams.  
><strong>**Gwen Cooper's friend request was accepted.**

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><p><strong>Gwen Cooper has commented on Rhys Williams' wall: <strong>I'm afraid it's going to be another night shift, dear.  
><strong>Rhys Williams has commented on Rhys Williams' wall: <strong> Again?  
><strong>Andy Davidson has commented on Rhys Williams' wall: <strong> No worries Williams, I'll keep her safe!  
><strong>Gwen Cooper has commented on Rhys Williams' wall: <strong>Oi! I can take care myself!  
><strong>Rhys Williams has commented on Rhys Williams' wall: <strong>That you can, sweetheart.

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><p><strong>Gwen Cooper has changer her employer from <strong>Cardiff PC Force **to ** Torchwood.

**Gwen Cooper friend requested Ianto Jones.  
><strong>**Gwen Cooper's friend request was accepted.**

**Gwen Cooper has friend requested Toshiko Sato.  
><strong>**Gwen Cooper's friend request was accepted.**

**Gwen Cooper has friend requested Owen Harper.  
><strong>**Gwen Cooper's friend request was accepted.**

**Gwen Cooper has friend requested Jack Harkness.  
><strong>**Gwen Cooper's friend request was accepted.**

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><p><strong>Andy Davidson has commented on Gwen Cooper's wall: <strong>So what's it like being part of the spooky do's?  
><strong>Gwen Cooper has commented on Gwen Cooper's wall: <strong>Come off it, Andy!  
><strong>Andy Davidson has commented on Gwen Cooper's wall: <strong>What? I'm just asking!  
><strong>Gwen Cooper has commented on Gwen Cooper's wall: <strong>Well quit it! You know I can't tell you that!  
><strong>Andy Davidson has commented on Gwen Cooper's wall: <strong>Fine, you just go have fun with your new best friends.  
><strong>Gwen Cooper has commented on Gwen Cooper's wall: <strong>Andy!

**Andy Davidson is no longer online.**

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><p><strong>Owen Harper has joined the "I'm a Doctor, dammit!" fan group. Owen Harper has invited Jack Harkness to become a fan. {click here to become a fan}<br>****Jack Harkness has responded to Owen Harper's invitation: **Really? I'm not even a doctor.  
><strong>Owen Harper has responded to Jack Harkness' response: <strong>Your loss, mate.  
><strong>Jack Harkness has responded to Owen Harper's response: <strong>I think you're drunk. Have you been drinking?  
><strong>Owen Harper has responded to Jack Harkness' response: <strong>Maybeeeee! BEsides, I'm not drunk! I'm… being extraordinary!

**Jack Harkness likes this.**

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><p><strong>Gwen Cooper might be late for work and is extremely sorry.<br>****Jack Harkness is trying not to fire the same person he hired yesterday for being late on her first day.  
><strong>**Ianto Jones is being told to make Gwen decaf if she is actually late.  
><strong>**Toshiko Sato is trying not laugh.  
><strong>**Owen Harper feels the same.**

**Owen Harper and 2 others like this.**

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><p>AN: Reviews!


	2. Chapter 2

A/N:Alright, I know this isn't exactly like the real Facebook, but I don't actually have one...

Disclaimer: The hobo's in da house!

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><p><strong>Jack Harkness is extremely bored.<br>****Toshiko Sato is sick of Jack Harkness' complaining.  
><strong>**Owen Harper is having fun insulting Teaboy.  
><strong>**Ianto Jones is threatening to make Owen decaf.  
><strong>**Gwen Cooper is wondering how Captain Jack became a Captain, and why does Torchwood have a pterodactyl?**

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><p><strong>Gwen Cooper commented on Rhys Williams' wall: <strong>Sweetheart, we might have to call off our dinner.  
><strong>Rhys Williams commented on Rhys Williams' wall: <strong>What? I've been planning this for a month  
><strong>Gwen Cooper commented on Rhys Williams' wall: <strong>Yes, well, I have to work late… You know how it is, special ops.  
><strong>Rhys Williams commented on Rhys Williams' wall: <strong>Does this have anything to do with that Harkness fellow?  
><strong>Jack Harkness commented on Rhys Williams' wall: <strong>So what if it does?  
><strong>Rhys Williams commented on Rhys Williams' wall: <strong>WHAT?  
><strong>Gwen Cooper commented on Rhys Williams' wall: <strong>Sweetheart, relax!  
><strong>Rhys Williams commented on Rhys Williams' wall: <strong>Calm down? You're canceling our date for this Harkness!  
><strong>Gwen Cooper commented on Rhys Williams' wall: <strong>He's my boss!  
><strong>Rhys Williams commented on Rhys Williams' wall: <strong> He's… your boss?  
><strong>Jack Harkness commented on Rhys Williams' wall: <strong>=P

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><p><strong>Gwen Cooper is making the attempt to apologize for eleasing a potentially lethal alien.<br>****Jack Harkness is refusing to accept her apology, insisting it was an accident.  
><strong>**Owen Harper wants to know why he won't accept her apology, why he isn't blaming her, and how did it qualify as an accident?  
><strong>**Ianto Jones thinks Owen should shut up an let Jack be the boss.  
><strong>**Jack Harkness is touched that Ianto stood up to crabby Owen for him.  
><strong>**Toshiko Sato is giggling to herself for reasons only she knows.  
><strong>**Owen Harper thinks Toshiko Sato is crazy.  
><strong>**Gwen Cooper is relieved Jack isn't yelling at her, and preparing to yell at Owen Harper.**

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><p><strong>Jon Hart has friend requested Jack Harkness.<br>****His request has been denied.**

**Jon Hart has friend requested Ianto Jones.  
><strong>**Ianto Jones has sent Jon Hart a private message: **Who is this?

**Jon Hart has deleted his account.**

**Jack Harkness likes this.**

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><p><strong>Owen Harper has started a "Bloody Torchwood" fan group.<br>****Owen Harper has become a fan of the "Bloody Torchwood" fan group.  
><strong>**Owen Harper has sent Jack Harkness an invitation to become a fan of the "Bloody Torchwood"fan group. {click here to become a fan}  
><strong>**Jack Harkness has responded to Owen Harper's invitation: **What? Why'd you make that?  
><strong>Owen Harper has responded to Jack Harkness' response: <strong>Because everything that ever goes wrong is either because of Torchwood, or made worse by Torchwood.  
><strong>Jack Harkness has responded to Owen Harper's invitation: <strong>What? What about all the times we've saved the world?  
><strong>Owen Harper has responded to Jack Harkness' response: <strong>Yeah? What about all the tomes we've put it in danger?

**Jack Harkness dislikes this.  
><strong>**Owen Harper likes this.**

**Jack Harkness is no longer online.**

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><p><strong>AN: Omg! Two chaps in one night? Who are you and what have you done too QuietTimeChocolates? R&R or you'll never get **QuietTimeChocolates** back!**


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: YAYYYYYYY! THREE CHAPPIES IN ONE NIGHT! Thanks too the reviewers, I Love Ianto and Pelowskin. Whatever that's supposed to mean.

Disclaimer: Want you too see all of things I don't ownnnn... (All of the Lights reference)

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><p><strong>Jack Harkness is looking for a shag.<br>****Toshiko Sato is disgusted that Jack would post that.  
><strong>**Jack Harkness has sent Ianto Jones a private message regarding his status: **Interested?  
><strong>Ianto Jones regrets (not really) to inform Jack that he is <strong>**not**** interested.  
><strong>**Owen Harper is laughing his head off at the rejection preformed by Ianto Jones**

**Toshiko Sato and Gwen Cooper like this.  
><strong>

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><p><strong>Ianto Jones has changed his relationship status from <strong>single **to ** in a relationship **with Jack Harkness.  
><strong>**Jack Harkness has changed his relationship status from **single 'n loving it **to** in a relationship **with** **Ianto Jones.**

**Jack Harkness poked Ianto Jones.  
><strong>**Ianto Jones poked Jack Harkness.**

**Owen Harper dislikes this.**

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><p><strong>Owen Harper has started a "To Annoy Teaboy" fan group.<br>****Owen Harper has become a fan of the "To Annoy Teaboy" fan group.  
><strong>**Owen Harper has sent Jack Harkness an invitation to become a fan of the "To Annoy Teaboy" fan group. {click here to become a fan}  
><strong>**Jack Harkness has responded to Owen Harper's invitation: **Lay off my boyfriend, would you?  
><strong>Owen Harper has responded to Jack Harkness' response: <strong>Well I can't insult you, your my boss.  
><strong>Jack Harkness has responded to Owen Harper's response: <strong>Well since he's dating the boss, consider that an order.  
><strong>Owen Harper has started a "Bloody Jack F**king Harkness" fan group.<br>****Owen has become a fan of the "Bloody Jack F**king Harkness" fan group. {click here to become a fan}**

**Jack Harkness dislikes this.**

**Jack Harkness is no longer online.**

**Owen Harper likes this.**

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><p><strong>Rhys Williams would like to know when he'll be getting his wife back.<br>****Andy Davidson wants to know when his best friend will quit ignoring him.**

**Andy Davidson and Rhys Williams dislike this.**

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><p><strong>Rhiannon Davies has friend requested Ianto Jones.<br>****Rhiannon Davies' friend request was accepted.**

**Rhiannon Davies commented on Ianto Jones' wall: **In a relationship? With Jack Harkness? A man?  
><strong>Ianto Jones has commented on Ianto Jones' wall: <strong>Oh shit  
><strong>Rhiannon Davies commented on Ianto Jones' wall: <strong>Ianto! You didn't tell me you were playing for the other team!  
><strong>Ianto Jones has commented on Ianto Jones' wall: <strong> But.. I-umm I'm not  
><strong>Rhiannon Davies commented on Ianto Jones' wall: <strong>Oh really?Care to explain your relationship status?

**Ianto Jones is no longer online.**

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><p>AN: Reviews pretty pretty pretty pretty please!


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer; Hobo in da house!

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><p><strong>Jack Harkness is extremely happy and lucky to have Ianto Jones.<br>****Ianto Jones is happier than he has ever been.**

**Jack Harkness poked Ianto Jones.  
><strong>**Ianto Jones poked Jack Harkness.**

**Owen Harper dislikes this.**

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><p><strong>Rhiannon Davies is wondering when Ianto Jones will talk to her.<strong>

**Rhiannon Davies dislikes this.**

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><p><strong>Toshiko Sato is trying to figure out why the rift detector isn't working.<br>****Gwen Cooper suggests she resets it.  
><strong>**Owen Harper is laughing his head off at Gwen's unbelievably stupid suggestion.  
><strong>**Ianto Jones is making coffee for everyone.  
><strong>**Jack Harkness is telling Gwen Cooper and Owen Harper to shut the hell up.**

**Gwen Cooper has become a fan of the "Bloody Jack F**king Harkness" fan group.**

**Owen Harper likes this.**

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><p><strong>Rhys Williams friend requested Rhiannon Davies.<br>****Rhys Williams' request as accepted.**

**Rhys Williams commented on Rhiannon Davies' wall: **You another sufferer of a special ops friend?  
><strong>Rhiannon Davies commented on Rhiannon Davies' wall: <strong>Not quite, public servant.  
><strong>Rhys Williams commented on Rhiannon Davies' wall: <strong>Oh really? I wasn't aware public servants had odd hours.  
><strong>Rhiannon Davies commented on Rhiannon Davies' wall: <strong>They don't usually, but apparently my brother does.  
><strong>Rhys Williams commented on Rhiannon Davies' wall: <strong>What a shame.

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><p><strong>Owen Harper has started a "Teaboy makes good coffee" fan group.<br>****Owen Harper has joined the "Teaboy makes good coffee" fan group.  
><strong>**Owen Harper has invited Jack Harkness and 3 others to become a fan of the "Teaboy makes good coffee" fan group. {click here to become a fan}**

**Jack Harkness and 3 others have accepted.**

**Jack Harkness and 3 others like this.**

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><p><strong>Owen Harper has started a "It was an Accident!" fan group.<br>****Owen Harper has become a fan of the "It was an Accident!" fan group.  
><strong>**Owen Harper has invited Jack Harkness to become a fan of the "It was an Accident!"{click here to become a fan}  
><strong>**Jack Harkness has responded to Owen Harper's invitation: **What did you do now?

**Owen harper is no longer online.**

**Jack Harkness likes this.**

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><p><strong>Ianto Jones has commented on Rhiannon Davies' wall: <strong>Rhiannon?  
><strong>Rhiannon Davies has commented on Rhiannon Davies' wall: <strong>Yes?  
><strong>Ianto Jones has commented on Rhiannon Davies' wall: <strong> I umm- I  
><strong>Rhiannon Davies has commented on Rhiannon Davies' wall: <strong>Well off course we can have Jack over for dinner!  
><strong><strong>Jack Harkness has commented on Rhiannon Davies wall: <strong>**Yay!**  
>Ianto Jones has commented on Rhiannon Davies' wall: <strong>WHAT?  
><strong>Rhiannon Davies has commented on Rhiannon Davies' wall: <strong>Alright, tomorrow night 6:30, don't be late!

**Rhiannon Davies is no longer online.**

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><p><strong>Ianto Jones is doomed.<br>****Jack Harkness thinks Ianto should just be himself.  
><strong>**Ianto Jones is doubly doomed.**

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><p>AN: OMG WHAT'LL HAPPEN AT DINNER! REVIEWS- oops sorry bout the caps, reviews would be appreciated! =3


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: ta-daa! R&R please!

Disclaimer: Need I say it again?

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><p><strong>Ianto Jones is getting ready for the longest night of his life.<br>****Jack Harkness is reassuring his wonderful and loving boyfriend.  
><strong>**Toshiko Sato is proud of Jack Harkness.  
><strong>**Gwen Cooper thinks Ianto will be fine.  
><strong>**Owen Harper says "Fat Chance," to Gwen Coopers status.**

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><p><strong>Gwen Cooper has commented on Toshiko Sato's wall:<strong> Do you think Jack'll piss off Ianto?  
><strong>Toshiko Sato has commented on Toshiko Sato's wall: <strong>Of course not! …I hope.  
><strong>Owen Harper has commented on Toshiko Sato's wall: <strong>That's likely. Jack's a guy from the 51st century that flirts with anything in his site, and he's visiting a Welsh home during the 21st century, that has kids, where monogamy is the norm. There is no way Jack'll be able to mess this up.  
><strong>Gwen Cooper has commented on Toshiko Sato's wall: <strong>Shut up Owen, they'll be fine.  
><strong>Owen Harper has commented on Toshiko Sato's wall: <strong>How is Ianto supposed to explain it? He dated Lisa for what, four years, and suddenly, he's fallen for a guy?  
><strong>Gwen Cooper has commented on Toshiko Sato's wall: <strong>Not just any guy. Captain Jack Harkness. Everybody can't help but like him.  
><strong>Owen Harper has commented on Toshiko Sato's wall: <strong>That's cause Harkness cheats.  
><strong>Toshiko Sato has commented on Toshiko Sato's wall: <strong>Hate to interrupt the love fest, but don't you have to be somewhere Gwen?  
><strong>Gwen Cooper has commented on Toshiko Sato's wall: <strong>Oh shit! Rhys'll kill me if I'm late!

**Owen Harper likes this.**

**Gwen Cooper is no longer online.**

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><p><strong>Ianto Jones is very pissed off.<br>****Jack Harkness is extremely sorry.  
><strong>

**Ianto Jones chatted with Jack Harkness: **Really Jack? Really?  
><strong>Jack Harkness chatted with Ianto Jones: <strong>How was I supposed to know it was you sister?  
><strong>Ianto Jones chatted with Jack Harkness: <strong>You weren't, but did you have to flirt with her?  
><strong>Rhiannon Davies chatted with Ianto Jones: <strong>Calm down Sweetheart, it's fine! In fact, made me feel young again.  
><strong>Jack Harkness chatted with Ianto Jones: <strong>There, see? No harm done! Forgive me Yan? Please?  
><strong>Ianto Jones chatted with Jack Harkness: <strong>Damn you Jack Harkness, and your charm too.  
><strong>Jack Harkness chatted with Ianto Jones: <strong>How about I make it up to you later…?

**Ianto Jones likes this.**

**Ianto Jones is relieved to say that everybody seems to like Jack.  
><strong>**Jack Harkness is touched that the kids are calling him Uncle Jack and want him to tell them stories.  
><strong>**Rhiannon Davies loves Jack and can't believe Ianto would ever be embarrassed.  
><strong>**Ianto Jones is explaining that he wasn't embarrassed, he was just busy.  
><strong>**Rhiannon Davies doesn't believe him.  
><strong>**Ianto Jones is now worried about when they get to eating dinner.**

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><p><strong>Owen Harper has started a "King of the Weevils" fan group.<br>****Owen Harper has become a fan o the "King of the Weevils" fan group.  
><strong>**Owen Harper has invited Ianto Jones to become a fan of the "King of the Weevils" fan group. {click here to become a fan.}  
><strong>**Ianto Jones has responded to Owen Harper's invitation: **Was this what Jack was talking about? Why did you send me this?  
><strong>Owen Harper has responded to Ianto Jones' response: <strong>Well I figured anything to distract you from Jack.  
><strong>Ianto Jones has responded to Owen Harper's response: <strong>Yes, well, believe it or not, I don't hate the world like you do, Owen.  
><strong>Owen Harper has responded to Ianto Jones' response: <strong>Your choice, Teaboy.

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><p><strong>Jack Harkness is extremely happy, nearing euphoric.<br>****Ianto Jones is so relieved that his family likes Jack.  
><strong>**Rhiannon Davies has never seen her kids so eager for bed time and a story.  
><strong>**Jack Harkness says it just takes skills.**

**Toshiko Sato and Gwen Cooper like this.**

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><p><strong>Jack Harkness poked Ianto Jones.<br>****Ianto Jones poked Jack Harkness.**

**Owen Harper dislikes this.**

A/N: So the anonymous reviewer, 'gina', thank you for your review, I'm glad you liked it, but please refrain from swearing. That goes for everyone else, too, please.


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